IMPACT: Parenting with Perspective

Awareness, Acceptance & Intentionality

March 17, 2022 Ben Pugh Episode 92
IMPACT: Parenting with Perspective
Awareness, Acceptance & Intentionality
Show Notes

Awareness, Acceptance, and Intentionality

Have you ever been dissatisfied and launched into action to try to fix it?

I'm going on a diet. I'm starting an exercise program. I'm getting a new job. I'm getting a coach.

These are all examples of launching into DOING new or more or different things. 

The problem is, if you haven't gained awareness and acceptance, you're basically throwing darts in the dark.

Einstein said, “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.”

Gaining awareness, acceptance, and intentionality will help you level up your consciousness.

Observer Effect

In science, there's a phenomenon called The Observer Effect. 

Basically, scientists noticed that by simply observing an experiment, it changed the outcome. 

By simply observing things in your life, awareness, you can completely change your outcomes. 

Observation is a powerful tool when it comes to awareness. 

Position yourself as an observer and start watching and being aware of what's going on in your life. 

Awareness and the Self-Coaching Model

I love using the Self-Coaching Model from Brooke Castillo to help me develop awareness. 

Acceptance Is Necessary

Sometimes when you gain awareness, it's tempting to want to launch right into intention and to change everything that you've found that you don't like. 

You might find that once you have better awareness, you don't like what you find. This might lead to shame and disappointment.

The key is to accept what you find. 

It's okay. Nothing has gone wrong. 

If you cannot accept where you are and what you've learned from awareness, it's because of your own judgments about it. 

Intention Is Power

Once you've gained awareness, and once you've accepted what you've found, you can now move into intention.

Most people live in a reactionary state. This is one of the things that keeps parents stuck when it comes to BEing the parent of their dreams. They are so busy reacting and putting out fires that they don't have any mental and emotional bandwidth to be intentional. 

The goal is to be intentional with our energy and to do the important things that are not urgent. 

Sure, there will still be some urgent and important things that come up, but as you become more intentional, you will find that you have fewer fires to put out. 

The BE-DO-HAVE Model

You'll find that as you develop awareness and acceptance, and move forward with intentionality, you will find it easier to operate from the BE-DO-HAVE Model. 

Typically, when you try to parent from a place of ignorance rather than awareness, you try to focus more on the DOING. 

When you try to parent from a place of judgment rather than acceptance, you tend to focus more on the HAVING. 

When you follow the simple pattern of First Awareness, Second Acceptance, and Third Intention, it shifts your focus to your BEING. 

The Power of Awareness, Acceptance, and Intentionality

One of the things that I've found is that this simple process of awareness, acceptance, and intentionality makes life easier as a parent. 

It positions you as the hero rather than the victim. It will help to be responsible for your results rather than blaming or accusing others. 

This will help you be more intentional about how you think, feel, and act, rather than simply reflecting the thoughts, feelings, and actions of those around you. 

Call to ACTION!

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